In the ocean of cyber-space, the "bottles" are blogs like this one; the proverbial messages carefully tucked inside are what you read on the screen. It's not as romantic as receiving a mysterious glass bottle deposited on the sand by tidal waters, but the messages are no less important. Like many of the paper scrolls rolled into the bottles of yester-year, my piece tonight is about #LOVE.
At some point, no matter how many "messages" you've rolled into 21st century bottles, if the object of your affection isn't paying attention, you have to realize that all you're really doing is polluting the ocean. Your messages can only be received if the recipient is open. It's hard to swallow the harsh reality that a person you care about is closed to you. It feels like a rejection, even if there's no direct interaction. As if the recipient finds your bottle, but refuses to read the scroll--throwing it back in the ocean. You want to scream, "WTF???!!!" But there's no one to hear you in the vacuum of internet space.
The truth is, if someone you love is acting like they don't care, the real reason for their rejection has everything to do with them--not you. Unless they throw back the bottle with a new message, you have to somehow move on without them. It's hard to understand human relationships--how, we can be intimate one moment, and the next, total strangers. Have you heard the phrase, "Fake it 'til you make it?" That's what your lover's "rejection" is really about. Their fears surrounding your relationship are so great, their only choice is to walk away. At least, that's how the person you loved and lost sees it. They are faking apathy until, eventually, it becomes reality. But we in the desert of the real know, THERE IS ALWAYS A CHOICE. Making it is the difference between the hero of your heart versus the careless fool whose impotence will only break it.
Sex muddles otherwise straightforward situations like this. Someone broke your heart? That person was unworthy of you. It's clear in their clumsy handling of what is the most important organ in the human body, and, soul. Did you know that heart-muscles contain neurons? Neurons are cells that usually reside in the brain because they transmit information--in other words, these electrically excitable cells are what allow us to THINK. But they exist in the heart as well. Why? Autorhythmicity.
Autorhythmicity is the natural rhythm of your heart, thanks to your heart neurons--no outside stimulation necessary. Do you know what this means? Our heart-beat is nothing more than an expression of the heart's thoughts. Sometimes we meet a certain somebody who makes us feel amazing. Everything is better with them. Everything. But it doesn't last--not because of you, or your heart--you feel like you're in perfect rhythm. The other person isn't in sync--even if it feels that way to your heart. That's what happens when we feel heart-broken--our hearts actually hurt. Their rhythm is interrupted. Our rhythm. And it's never the same again.
But one day, when you least expect it, you'll see a bottle bobbing on the waves. Is it....??? No, it isn't. It's even better. A real human being! The ghost haunting you disappears into the ether (or Ethernet). Because the person who sent you that bottle is inviting you in, protecting you from echoes of the past, presenting you instead with a future. It's the gift of a second chance. A do-over. You can suddenly see fall walks amidst fallen leaves, a first kiss, tender friendship, playful intimacy--all the things you need to live not just a full a life, but a fulfilling one as well. And, it's never too late.
Empty relationships leave you feeling hopeless, helpless, isolated, and ultimately, rejected. You're alone, even in a crowded room. But a good relationship gives you constant joy--yes, constant. Accept nothing less. Don't let fear get in the way. Don't let the people you love get in the way either. Many times, the ones we love, in efforts to be helpful, do just the opposite. But it's a test. Of courage. Of strength. Of your commitment to yourself. Your commitment to #LOVE, and finding the one person who will give you that joy--even if she's not who you expected her to be.
The surprises are the best part of life...are you ready for yours???
At some point, no matter how many "messages" you've rolled into 21st century bottles, if the object of your affection isn't paying attention, you have to realize that all you're really doing is polluting the ocean. Your messages can only be received if the recipient is open. It's hard to swallow the harsh reality that a person you care about is closed to you. It feels like a rejection, even if there's no direct interaction. As if the recipient finds your bottle, but refuses to read the scroll--throwing it back in the ocean. You want to scream, "WTF???!!!" But there's no one to hear you in the vacuum of internet space.
The truth is, if someone you love is acting like they don't care, the real reason for their rejection has everything to do with them--not you. Unless they throw back the bottle with a new message, you have to somehow move on without them. It's hard to understand human relationships--how, we can be intimate one moment, and the next, total strangers. Have you heard the phrase, "Fake it 'til you make it?" That's what your lover's "rejection" is really about. Their fears surrounding your relationship are so great, their only choice is to walk away. At least, that's how the person you loved and lost sees it. They are faking apathy until, eventually, it becomes reality. But we in the desert of the real know, THERE IS ALWAYS A CHOICE. Making it is the difference between the hero of your heart versus the careless fool whose impotence will only break it.
Sex muddles otherwise straightforward situations like this. Someone broke your heart? That person was unworthy of you. It's clear in their clumsy handling of what is the most important organ in the human body, and, soul. Did you know that heart-muscles contain neurons? Neurons are cells that usually reside in the brain because they transmit information--in other words, these electrically excitable cells are what allow us to THINK. But they exist in the heart as well. Why? Autorhythmicity.
Autorhythmicity is the natural rhythm of your heart, thanks to your heart neurons--no outside stimulation necessary. Do you know what this means? Our heart-beat is nothing more than an expression of the heart's thoughts. Sometimes we meet a certain somebody who makes us feel amazing. Everything is better with them. Everything. But it doesn't last--not because of you, or your heart--you feel like you're in perfect rhythm. The other person isn't in sync--even if it feels that way to your heart. That's what happens when we feel heart-broken--our hearts actually hurt. Their rhythm is interrupted. Our rhythm. And it's never the same again.
But one day, when you least expect it, you'll see a bottle bobbing on the waves. Is it....??? No, it isn't. It's even better. A real human being! The ghost haunting you disappears into the ether (or Ethernet). Because the person who sent you that bottle is inviting you in, protecting you from echoes of the past, presenting you instead with a future. It's the gift of a second chance. A do-over. You can suddenly see fall walks amidst fallen leaves, a first kiss, tender friendship, playful intimacy--all the things you need to live not just a full a life, but a fulfilling one as well. And, it's never too late.
Empty relationships leave you feeling hopeless, helpless, isolated, and ultimately, rejected. You're alone, even in a crowded room. But a good relationship gives you constant joy--yes, constant. Accept nothing less. Don't let fear get in the way. Don't let the people you love get in the way either. Many times, the ones we love, in efforts to be helpful, do just the opposite. But it's a test. Of courage. Of strength. Of your commitment to yourself. Your commitment to #LOVE, and finding the one person who will give you that joy--even if she's not who you expected her to be.
The surprises are the best part of life...are you ready for yours???
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