That handsome fellow next to me is Dean Cain. Yes, THAT Dean Cain of LOIS & CLARK fame. We were tearing it up at Wizard World New Orleans earlier this month. You'll have to wait for more on my time in the Big Easy though....
In the span of a single day, I blew through a whopping SEVEN states. Yup, Stevie Nicks isn't the only gypsy. But my adventures include something bigger than the expanse of the beautiful Smokey Mountains...that "something bigger" is #LOVE.
#LOVE is the miracle that turns sociopaths into people. The joy we get from giving and receiving #LOVE is unparalleled. Yet #LOVE is also the cause of our greatest pain. My heart has been broken more times than I can count. At this point, it's more scar tissue than muscle. But I'm ever-hopeful despite the pain...most of the time.
If we could judge #LOVE on feelings alone, we'd all be much happier. But #LOVE is more than a feeling (a la BOSTON), it's a commitment. "I love you" is easy to say; backing it up, however, takes MAJOR effort. And if you are the only one putting that effort forward, no matter how you feel, you are likely the only person driving the relationship. Maybe you feel like that's okay, but it isn't. Any person willing to give 100% for #LOVE deserves to be with someone who is not only willing, but more than capable of doing the same.
Facing the reality that you are giving more than you receive in #LOVE is really, really, really hard. Especially if your heart has been broken more often than not. Like mine. Probably like yours, too. Welcome to our humanity, right??? Wrong!
There's nothing complicated about backing up "I love you" with clear actions that match those feelings. Like Nike, you just do it. And when you do, you at least expect a cup of coffee for your trouble, maybe dinner, a flower, SOMETHING. You don't expect to be left hanging out to dry like yesterday's laundry after a sunny day. But it happens. And when it does, the bouncing ball is in your court.
#LOVE is hard to find, When you find it, you don't want to lose it. You'll do anything to keep it. But if you're the only one making real action-oriented efforts to support that #LOVE, it's time to take a step back. Maybe your partner will realize their mistake when you do. Maybe not. No matter what, you've already proven yourself. It's their turn. Even if you feel like being apart from your beloved will kill you, you MUST have self-respect. No one else will give it to you.
Being taken for granted is a common problem for those of us who are doers. However, it's not ours. The problem rests on those taking us for granted. Blind, lazy, scared, maybe even outright stupid...whatever the reason, the only agency you have is on your own behalf. You are not Jesus. You cannot make blind men see. The best you can do is take off your own rose-colored glasses. If you like what you see, bully for you! If you don't, open your mouth. Have a conversation. Change may be hard, but it is necessary if both your words and your actions are not taken seriously in a serious situation. And as playful as #LOVE can be, if there isn't mutual respect--in other words an even give-and-take--you will playing through more than your share of pain.
I will keep you posted as I continue my journey through life and #LOVE...please do the same!