I really feel it. Love. And, I was feeling it when my big epiphany struck around two o'clock this morning. What preceded my "aha!" moment? It was a song written by Taylor Swift, of all people. She didn't sing it, but she felt every word. I find that remarkable. Because, Taylor Swift is only 27-years old. I'm 18 years older than Swift and I didn't feel or understand the words in her song until today. I think that means I've been the one hiding, or at least avoiding truly living my life. That's not anyone else's fault but my own.
We all want partners-in-crime, a person we can share secrets with. Someone to dream with, plan with, and laugh with. A person to share joy with. Create peace with. And, ultimately, find bliss with. We may find such an individual--perhaps more than once. But, we may also find people who are Trojan Horses.
Obviously, Taylor Swift did....
A Trojan Horse looks like a gift from the gods, but in reality, that person is just an empty shell hiding a host of enemies on the inside. When you let your guard down, those enemies come spilling out all over your life. Ugh.
For some of us more loyal types, it can be hard to see that your gift from the gods was anything but. We want to give the benefit of the doubt, even when we catch someone red-handed. When you're in-the-moment, it's easy to see denial as forgiveness. But, denial is self-sabotage. Maybe it's driven by ego or pride or a little of both, but we refuse to see the truth. Some things are just unthinkable. So when the unthinkable happens, you have to accept that your "gift" is not the real deal.
When love is real, it encompasses not just smokin' hot sex, laughter and fun...it's the whole enchilada. You want to care and support and raise up the person you love. You will move whole mountains, turn 0.02% chances into guarantees, and generally make the impossible, possible. When love is real, so is your unbridled enthusiasm to not only make your own life better, but better the life of the person you care about, too. Love is patient and kind. It's compassionate, not judgmental. It seeks solutions instead of problems. Love uses a gentle hand and an even gentler tongue. It is considerate, thoughtful, and forgiving. If you give that kind of love but get the opposite in return, you have yourself a Trojan Horse...and, I am deeply sorry for that.
Sorry because, I know how hard it is to reprogram your brain. It's not easy or simple. You go backwards more often than you'd like to admit. But, I'm writing this to you now so you know that, no matter how many times you "forget" your Trojan Horse is a Trojan Horse, you will come to recognize one day how much you love yourself--and that's something you'll never forget.
Today's message is about not giving up on yourself or your dreams. No matter how awful, how terrible, how lonely, how sad you may feel, remember that because you have the ability to love with such ferocity, you yourself are lovable. You, and all that love you feel, exists. And, because you exist, so does your equal.
Believe in yourself...move those mountains just for you! Make the impossible, possible. The improbable, probable. And the next time you look in the mirror, you will see both your inner and outer beauty shine. Once you do, others will, too.
#Epiphany
*The video is not the Taylor Swift song I refer to above...today, it's just a song.