That was the face staring at me on my screen yesterday. Those blues, unforgettable. I'd dreamt about her, many, many times. But when I opened my phone, still rubbing sleep out of my eyes, and saw her...my heart seized. The pain was so acute, I thought I was having a heart attack--as if someone were squeezing the four-chambered organ, tighter and tighter.
This angelic face came in the midst of #224 being literally everywhere: School buses, license plates, phone numbers, receipts...I felt like I was going insane. It's one thing if you look for those numbers, but I wasn't looking. I'd be in traffic and a car would cut in front of me with a license plate that had a series of letters followed by "2224". Then, a mile or so up the road, a transport-van with a phone number ending in "2242" was waiting next to me at a traffic light. An ad on TV selling "2 for $24!" flashed across the flat screen later that day. The numbers even showed up in my research...the solar longitude for the 10th lunar month in the Chinese calendar is between 224-degrees and 244-degrees. No, I'm not kidding.
Next, #224 appeared on my car-clock...which may not seem unusual, except that I wasn't sitting and waiting for the clock to turn to the right numbers. I was driving and talking on Bluetooth when I asked what time it was, anxious I might be late. "Around 2:30," was the reply so I looked at the clock to get a more specific read, and there it was: Another #224! But the synchronicities didn't end there.
The analytics for a particular blog post I'd written showed #224 views that same day as well. I tried to document as many of these synchronicities as possible. For my own benefit. Just to verify that I really did see #224 over and over and over again, and, in a myriad of different ways. Numerologists would have a field day...#224 isn't just urban-slang for "2day, 2morrow & 4ever," it also encompasses multiple #MasterNumbers in combinations that represent #Awakening, #TwinFlames, #MasterBuilders, #AscendedMasterBuilders, #MasterTeachers, and #ArchAngels, as well as the karmic debt number for cause-and-effect, infinity, and even abundance...IF the soul carrying that number makes the necessary adjustments and clears the negatives, that is.
Later on, an invitation to a women's event showed up in my Inbox at exactly 2:24pm. I ended up not being able to attend, but because of that email, I was invited to march in a St. Patrick's Day parade celebrating it's 40th year! My grandparents came to the States from Cork. Today, I'm connected to Ireland through colleagues in the publishing industry; we are collaborating at this very moment on a mental health volume being published this fall. Many of my favorite people live in Ireland. In fact, when I die, I will be remembered in Ireland. That's where you will find my marker. In Cork. I can only hope my survivors follow my wishes and spread some of my ashes there, while spreading the rest between Red Top Mountain in Georgia, Cape Cod in Massachusetts, Shark Beach in Sydney, Australia, and the Ganges River in India. What a great trip that will be! Retracing my steps all over the world, leaving a little piece of me behind in every location. That's the best memorial I could ever ask for. Besides a giant "After Party" with white stretch limos, disco lights, loud music, and free shots of good tequila and bourbon--my favorites--served up with my personal recipes for home-made mac-n-cheese, Tuscan pizza with fresh basil, and, bourbon banana bread topped with berry salad, smothered in my home-made bourbon whipped cream, and drizzled in my special caramel sauce. Oh yes, that will be something to remember. Like those blue eyes....
I had a dream before waking this morning. It was winter and I was walking with ski poles along a road not too far from me. The bridge was out but the snow and ice had created a natural bridge. My little dog was with me, too. I was hesitant to cross the bridge, concerned that we may not be able to cross back if it melted. But, crossing was necessary. I'm not sure why except to say it is a bridge I often have to cross in real life. It was closed for repairs for nearly a year and re-opened just last weekend. I drove over it for the first time five days ago, on my way to a funeral. Perhaps that's why when my dog and I tried to return to the other side in the dream, we found the natural bridge had fallen into the frigid water below. I was not too disheartened though, because I knew I'd find another way back eventually. My main concern was that my little companion was getting too close to the edge.
The dream was essentially about crossing a point of no return. In life, we're often unaware of those moments. I'm brave, confident and capable, so I will always cross a questionable bridge if it's necessary to move forward. While I crossed the bridge in the dream with every intention of going back, things beyond my control created consequences I then had to live with. Maybe that bridge represents the next phase of my life. If things had gone the way I hoped two years ago, I'd have that little girl in the picture. But I turn 46 this year; that was a dream I started at 42. You can see why I may be psychologically traveling to places from which I cannot return. Not now, or ever. That beautiful face in the picture may have to be one of those places....
Second chances abound in our 20's and 30's, but by our mid-40's, there are fewer and fewer chances we can afford to take, because, frankly, we have less time. I'm not dying tomorrow; that's not what I mean. However, with each passing day, my chances of having another child decrease. Not because of age--that's no longer the biggest stumbling block. It's more about time itself. And, the clock just turned 12:24. Right on cue!
While I'm fully prepared to live my life without having more children, I really wanted more. Regret isn't something I feel though because I did everything in my power to make that happen. Yet somehow, without even realizing it, I walked across a bridge made of snow and ice; it melts a little more with each passing day. I cannot go backwards now, even if I wanted to. No one can, but if you're 10 years younger than me, you have 10 years more to find that second chance. Mine may be right around the corner...I can't say for certain at this point. All any of us can do is live the best life we possibly can. No matter what happens to your bridge in the interim.
My Inbox has 2,442 emails tonight. That may seem like a lot, but I just emptied it a few days ago. Apparently, that numerical combination carries a meaning, besides the related #224 synchronicities I've experienced in the last few days. The number advises not to waste time on people who don't support me or bring me joy in any way, but instead, to use that time to move my life-purpose forward. Patience is recommended; the right people will show up at the right time to open the right doors. Unconditional love of the self will be rewarded when I help others to do the same.
Guess that means I'm not quite done yet. But I'll cross that bridge when I get there....
#AwakeLife #TwinFlames Post-script: I just remember hearing her voice. It was in the dream. Right before I woke. She was giving me a new math problem. I anxiously awaited the first number. Wherever we were, it was all white. I could barely see her face. She said, smiling, "Multiply two times...," and I waited for the number "twenty-four," but she saw the anticipation on my face and changed her mind: "Two times twenty-six." #226??? We'll see what the future brings. Perhaps the #224 simply means my true soulmate is born on the 22nd; with my soul number being "4", that would make a #224. The new number has me wondering if I meet this "22" in the month of June (6). Time will tell!
This angelic face came in the midst of #224 being literally everywhere: School buses, license plates, phone numbers, receipts...I felt like I was going insane. It's one thing if you look for those numbers, but I wasn't looking. I'd be in traffic and a car would cut in front of me with a license plate that had a series of letters followed by "2224". Then, a mile or so up the road, a transport-van with a phone number ending in "2242" was waiting next to me at a traffic light. An ad on TV selling "2 for $24!" flashed across the flat screen later that day. The numbers even showed up in my research...the solar longitude for the 10th lunar month in the Chinese calendar is between 224-degrees and 244-degrees. No, I'm not kidding.
Next, #224 appeared on my car-clock...which may not seem unusual, except that I wasn't sitting and waiting for the clock to turn to the right numbers. I was driving and talking on Bluetooth when I asked what time it was, anxious I might be late. "Around 2:30," was the reply so I looked at the clock to get a more specific read, and there it was: Another #224! But the synchronicities didn't end there.
The analytics for a particular blog post I'd written showed #224 views that same day as well. I tried to document as many of these synchronicities as possible. For my own benefit. Just to verify that I really did see #224 over and over and over again, and, in a myriad of different ways. Numerologists would have a field day...#224 isn't just urban-slang for "2day, 2morrow & 4ever," it also encompasses multiple #MasterNumbers in combinations that represent #Awakening, #TwinFlames, #MasterBuilders, #AscendedMasterBuilders, #MasterTeachers, and #ArchAngels, as well as the karmic debt number for cause-and-effect, infinity, and even abundance...IF the soul carrying that number makes the necessary adjustments and clears the negatives, that is.
Later on, an invitation to a women's event showed up in my Inbox at exactly 2:24pm. I ended up not being able to attend, but because of that email, I was invited to march in a St. Patrick's Day parade celebrating it's 40th year! My grandparents came to the States from Cork. Today, I'm connected to Ireland through colleagues in the publishing industry; we are collaborating at this very moment on a mental health volume being published this fall. Many of my favorite people live in Ireland. In fact, when I die, I will be remembered in Ireland. That's where you will find my marker. In Cork. I can only hope my survivors follow my wishes and spread some of my ashes there, while spreading the rest between Red Top Mountain in Georgia, Cape Cod in Massachusetts, Shark Beach in Sydney, Australia, and the Ganges River in India. What a great trip that will be! Retracing my steps all over the world, leaving a little piece of me behind in every location. That's the best memorial I could ever ask for. Besides a giant "After Party" with white stretch limos, disco lights, loud music, and free shots of good tequila and bourbon--my favorites--served up with my personal recipes for home-made mac-n-cheese, Tuscan pizza with fresh basil, and, bourbon banana bread topped with berry salad, smothered in my home-made bourbon whipped cream, and drizzled in my special caramel sauce. Oh yes, that will be something to remember. Like those blue eyes....
I had a dream before waking this morning. It was winter and I was walking with ski poles along a road not too far from me. The bridge was out but the snow and ice had created a natural bridge. My little dog was with me, too. I was hesitant to cross the bridge, concerned that we may not be able to cross back if it melted. But, crossing was necessary. I'm not sure why except to say it is a bridge I often have to cross in real life. It was closed for repairs for nearly a year and re-opened just last weekend. I drove over it for the first time five days ago, on my way to a funeral. Perhaps that's why when my dog and I tried to return to the other side in the dream, we found the natural bridge had fallen into the frigid water below. I was not too disheartened though, because I knew I'd find another way back eventually. My main concern was that my little companion was getting too close to the edge.
The dream was essentially about crossing a point of no return. In life, we're often unaware of those moments. I'm brave, confident and capable, so I will always cross a questionable bridge if it's necessary to move forward. While I crossed the bridge in the dream with every intention of going back, things beyond my control created consequences I then had to live with. Maybe that bridge represents the next phase of my life. If things had gone the way I hoped two years ago, I'd have that little girl in the picture. But I turn 46 this year; that was a dream I started at 42. You can see why I may be psychologically traveling to places from which I cannot return. Not now, or ever. That beautiful face in the picture may have to be one of those places....
Second chances abound in our 20's and 30's, but by our mid-40's, there are fewer and fewer chances we can afford to take, because, frankly, we have less time. I'm not dying tomorrow; that's not what I mean. However, with each passing day, my chances of having another child decrease. Not because of age--that's no longer the biggest stumbling block. It's more about time itself. And, the clock just turned 12:24. Right on cue!
While I'm fully prepared to live my life without having more children, I really wanted more. Regret isn't something I feel though because I did everything in my power to make that happen. Yet somehow, without even realizing it, I walked across a bridge made of snow and ice; it melts a little more with each passing day. I cannot go backwards now, even if I wanted to. No one can, but if you're 10 years younger than me, you have 10 years more to find that second chance. Mine may be right around the corner...I can't say for certain at this point. All any of us can do is live the best life we possibly can. No matter what happens to your bridge in the interim.
My Inbox has 2,442 emails tonight. That may seem like a lot, but I just emptied it a few days ago. Apparently, that numerical combination carries a meaning, besides the related #224 synchronicities I've experienced in the last few days. The number advises not to waste time on people who don't support me or bring me joy in any way, but instead, to use that time to move my life-purpose forward. Patience is recommended; the right people will show up at the right time to open the right doors. Unconditional love of the self will be rewarded when I help others to do the same.
Guess that means I'm not quite done yet. But I'll cross that bridge when I get there....
#AwakeLife #TwinFlames Post-script: I just remember hearing her voice. It was in the dream. Right before I woke. She was giving me a new math problem. I anxiously awaited the first number. Wherever we were, it was all white. I could barely see her face. She said, smiling, "Multiply two times...," and I waited for the number "twenty-four," but she saw the anticipation on my face and changed her mind: "Two times twenty-six." #226??? We'll see what the future brings. Perhaps the #224 simply means my true soulmate is born on the 22nd; with my soul number being "4", that would make a #224. The new number has me wondering if I meet this "22" in the month of June (6). Time will tell!
RSS Feed