In the dream, I was in a house that wasn't my house. It was quite similar to my home in Atlanta, but there seemed to be more rooms, or perhaps, less rooms. Smaller but less open. More compartmentalized. Very like my brain. Lots of pain boxed up in my grey matter, like most humans. We have to survive somehow. And, that's how. By putting away the pain that haunts us. Because, the past is over. The people who hurt us are gone. We are now in our present, or what was once our future. If we don't want that pain to hold us back in the next set of futures ahead, we have to box it up. Put it away on some dusty shelf in our mental attic. Let it creak and moan with the other ghosts we keep there.
In the Atlanta house, my daughter's room had a huge cathedral window facing west. The lush green of a big maple tree peaked through, waving at you from anywhere in the room. Birds would nest in that tree. You could see them flying hither and tither, busily flitting about. Lots of movement and song. When the sun set, streams of orange and pink, red and purple, painted the walls. At night, you could even see the stars twinkling high above, as if God decided to decorate the sky with diamonds just for my baby girl.
It's always difficult to have a dream where I'm pregnant again. A dream that takes me backwards--even when I'm awake. But it has meaning. Value. Our dreams give us clues to what we really want. How we hope to live our lives. What makes us happy...and, what doesn't. I was happy in the dream but knew things weren't the way they were supposed to be. Knew it was a dream. An old friend was also in the house. Someone I haven't seen in a very long time. Someone I love. And, while I was confused by the general setting and circumstances, I still felt happy. Distracted, but happy.
Even if caged, a lion prowls. Growls. Watching. Waiting for that moment when escape is possible. In that moment, my fangs and claws and mane are rendered effective. Dangerously so. Bulls like being kept in fences. Fish can never leave their ponds. Rams are just sheep with horns. Goats belong on a farm. Crabs need to stay in their shell. Scorpions, too. But lions are wild. We don't settle. We roam. Because, we're kings.
I am a king. In my right hand, I hold my daughter. My left clasps an arrow. That arrow is a hunter. Like me. But I don't hunt the weak or sick. My light hunts evil. So does my arrow. For, that arrow is the very spirit of EMMA: "Everything in my mind awaits."...that's what EMMA means. If you can dream of something to better yourself and others, EMMA will help make it happen.
Arrows are the best metaphor for light. It's a message to any who have been pulled back by their past. The arrow tells us that no matter how hard we are held against our will, we will eventually be released. When we free ourselves of whatever is holding us down and back, we can soar. It's as if we have grown wings and can rise high above our troubles, landing wherever our heart takes us. No matter where that is, we will have traveled further then we ever have before.
Perhaps that's what my dream was telling me. And, you. Our lives are cumulative. We live moment to moment. In increments. But the whole of it is something we can only see at the end. Or, rather, after it. When we can step back and see it all from a distance.That's why travel is so important. It gives perspective. If you spend too much time with the same people in the same place, you have no way to really see who you are. What you have become...if anything. It is in the eyes of strangers that we can truly see our own reflections. Many are too afraid to ever leave their familiar people and places. Those are the souls who are darkest. Because, there is no relief. No solace. Life is the same. Every day. Every year. For 75 years or less. Probably less. Unless you move more.
Our life (and our light) is increased by movement and what we put in our bodies. That includes experience, too. Your vibe doesn't always attract your tribe. You do. Who you are. Where you've lived. How you've lived. I've lived all over the world. You can see it on my face. In my smile. In the bracelets on my wrist from places like India and Vietnam. I know who I am, and wherever I go, I see myself reflected in the eyes of the people I meet. And, you know what? I like what I see. No one's perfect--certainly not me! But I'm still happy with who I am.
Who am I?
I am a daughter of the Sun. My mother named me RA so I would never forget the light that is inside me. That same light is inside each of you, too.
Can you feel it? Your light??? Where does it want you to go? What is your soul guiding you to accomplish? Be still. And, listen. Your soul speaks. You can hear it in the rustling of the leaves amidst the tops of big oak trees. In the purple hues of Crimson Kings. In bending birches and mossy Jackson Figs. You can hear it in the yews across the great sea. See it in the cottonwood floating through the air. Your soul speaks to you at the ocean, as waves pound the wet sand. You hear its echoes in the desert. See its sounds in the sun-dappled mountains and valleys.
Go there, my friends. Go to all those places. And listen to your soul speak your truth. If you can't hear yourself think where you currently live, how can you listen to anything or anyone else? How can you hear yourself??? You can't.
My light is calling to each of you. Perhaps life has pulled you backwards more than you care to admit. Maybe you were even broken once or twice. No matter what has or hasn't happened, nothing can diminish the infinite nature of your light. My palm touches the computer screen and sends you positive energy to positively charge you and your light. Right now. As you read these words, you are breathing a sigh of relief. You know things are going to somehow work out for you in the future. You can find what you need to make your world better. You can. And, you will.
Today is an "11" day in an "11" year, but the month of June is represented by a "6." That changes the #1111 (or "4") to a "10." A creator. Meant to recreate the cosmic divine on our planet.
Be brave. Be honest. And shine like every ride is your last. Whether you ride a horse, a cowboy, a cowgirl, or a Harley. Whatever's between your legs, make sure it brings you light. Make sure your kundalini is rising. It's actually our responsibility as physical anchors on Earth to awaken our light--our souls--and shine like the Sun. If you find a person who shines, too--shine together! Never settle for anything or anyone less. Never settle, period.
I believe in you...EMMA does, too. I'd slap your asses like a coach at a football game if you all were here in front of me. Since you're not, the best I can do is tell you to think of that image and know that with every fiber of my being, I'm cheering you on. When you think no one in the entire world cares about you, think of me and you'll know better. For, it is you who give my words meaning. The magic in that meaning is our unique connection--even if we've never met.
Now go forth, my Voyagers, and let yourselves shine like the *fucking* stars you are!