And, it does....
July itself is the 7th month but it's currently in the fourth Zodiacal house...that's another "11." And, during this last month, I did meet another #TwinFlame, as well as reconnect with the #Twin I've known for literally my entire life. We are but two months apart, which is another "11," and, though he does not know this, I was born at 5:24...which is his birthday. If I had to guess, I'd bet he was born around 7:31. The man I considered my #Twin is a mirror reflection of the #Twin I've known my whole life. Because he was always there, I never had that recognition moment...the "it's really you," I had with someone else. But I am starting to wonder if I had that moment with someone else because he is but a younger doppelgänger for the other. And, the clock just turned 8:38, or #1111.
Why am I being inundated with "11's"??? Because I am being called to awaken further. Just got a "yes" knock to that. My ethereal entourage has been very vocal lately. The reason? I have been stubbornly avoiding two things in particular--both connected to the blip on my proverbial computer screen a year and a half or so ago. I forget sometimes that it was just a year ago that I had to leave behind my entire life in order to avoid both being killed and taking another's life in defense of my own. Today, I would not run. Today, I'd shoot. Because, today, I love and value myself more than anything or anyone else. That makes me more dangerous than the criminals who pursued me. They have no concept of real love and certainly do not value themselves at all. But I already knew I was more powerful than them...that's what scared me into leaving in the first place.
I've always held myself back. Even in sex. It's kind of like Spider-Man, "With great power comes great responsibility." I know more than most. That means I'm responsible for anyone who knows less, even if those individuals are trying to hurt me.
And, that's the truth for ALL of us. But it is hard to be responsible for idiots like the people I had to literally THINK for last year. But, now that I've completed my part in that karma cycle, I am no longer responsible for their care and well being. I am now solely responsible for my own. That is all I ever need to remember.
To resent people who are clearly not on my level is the equivalent of resenting a mosquito for biting me. The mosquito is merely reacting to its environment. That is all a mosquito can do. I'm the only one who has the power to make choices: I can let the mosquito feed, then, live out its small life until someone else crushes it. Or, I can crush it. Or, I can be so engaged in my own world that the mosquito and it's bite are irrelevant to mine. No matter what, the mosquito ends up dead long before me. Until then, it's life is miserable, dependent on feeding off of others. It's mindless and hungry. It has no self-awareness. It can never achieve anything close to what I am capable of. While the mosquito is yet unaware of all of this, I am not.
That's another lesson learned in the last year: Loving a mosquito is a fruitless act. Because, mosquitos are incapable of loving you back. When you love them anyway, they're bound to bite you. And, ultimately, a mosquito can never be more than just a bug. Sometimes, when we are desperate enough, even a bug can look almost human. Camouflage. It's how they survive.
What I saw as beautiful once I now see as repulsive. It's not a trick of the mind...but it was the first time around. I was truly desperate to feel loved. So desperate, I mistook a mosquito's attentions for a kind of affection. Of course the mosquito orbited me--it was feeding off of me. It needed me. But when I became annoyed and began swatting at it, it simply moved on to the next complacent body. Mosquitos are innately co-dependent. And, that's unhealthy. It's how they spread disease.
Love is unconditional when it's real. That means that when you love, even if it's just a mosquito, that love goes nowhere. However, once you develop the ability to love unconditionally, it naturally extends to yourself as well. You actually become healthier. And, when you recognize unconditional love of the self, you will quietly walk away from the toxicity of others you may also love, but who do not love you back. Because, you can now recognize real love. You will never again settle for love that isn't real. Even if it means the only person who truly loves you for the rest of your life is you. Love does conquer all...but that victory isn't always what we might expect.
When you have the ability to love unconditionally, it attracts people. All people, even the mosquitos of our species. Unconditional love is your light and your shield. It will protect you. Guide you. And, one day, you will find another soul like yours. Beautiful, inside and out. It's worth the wait...and, the weight.
Toward the end of July, we move into the fifth house. My house. In numerology, that time period becomes #111, which signifies thoughts manifesting into reality. That's why #Leos are so powerful yet are often underachievers. We can believe in something enough that it becomes real, even if that something is self-destructive. Learn from my house. Think only positive thoughts. Only work from a place of positive energy. And you will have the power to make manifest those positives into the world. Most of August opens the doors for #TwinFlames and overall awakening, so, prepare now for what is yet to come.
Your soul may be infinite, but you will never again live this same lifetime....