The biggest stumbling block when dating an older chick is getting social acceptance of your decision. Let's face it, guys--everyone wants a beautiful woman. And women 40 and up can afford the necessities of looking beautiful 24/7. The best part? You aren't expected to cough up a dime. Yes, women in their prime, like their male counterparts, are professionally and financially established. All good news, except...your mom was hoping to "see you with a girl your age," while your friends can't stop making "cougar" and "MILF" jokes. Anyone for a slice of American Pie???
Unfortunately, there's no easy fix. If you can't hold your own in your social circle, don't even start dating someone you can't handle. Older gals aren't interested in wimps. Been there, done that. What that demographic IS interested in is fun...with a capital "F".
Are you F-un??? Do you like to go out to bars and restaurants? Enjoy travel? Want GREAT sex? Intelligent conversation? A sense of humor? Appreciate adventurousness?
If you answered a resounding, "Yes!" to any of the above, strap on your breast plates, gentlemen, because you are ready for the ride of your young lives. And sure, you can take that literally if you want to....
Once you decide to date UP, there are a few simple rules you may want to keep in your back-pocket (along with those condoms...better bring more than one):
1) Don't play games. You may feel like you can because your HOT older babe will want your young bod no matter what, but she won't. Games are for children, not someone who is confident in who she is. You can try to go all Hasbro on your new gal-pal, but chances are good you'll get shut down. And, out. Not your end goal. You're in it to win it, man! So man-up.
2) If you bring up her age, you're an idiot. Stop yourself. If it's a problem, better think that through before you even ask her out (or, answer her if she asks you...how lucky can you get?). Age is really just a number if you find someone attractive and they feel the same about you. Don't let anything or anyone ruin would could be the most fulfilling relationship you'll ever have. If you do, you don't deserve it in the first place.
3) When friends and family express "concerns," tell them to MYOFB: Mind Your Own Fucking Business. Said concerns are only a regurgitation of patriarchal blather. There are much more interesting things to talk about. Like sex, for example. Don't you agree???
4) Sex. It's inevitable. She'll want you to get tested and use condoms. Like Nike, just do it. Don't complain or try the "but it feels better without one" excuse that probably only worked on your 15-year old high school girlfriend (yet you keep using it anyway). If you are open, you will have THE BEST sex of your life. Hands. Down. Though, your hands are probably welcome anywhere if you two are exclusive. Which leads me to my next point:
5) "What about love? Don't you want someone to care about you???" The Heart lyrics have a point: Everyone needs #LOVE. So will your girlfriend, no matter how old she is, or, how young you are. You may be concerned that if you fall in love, and want to marry, you won't get certain things out of life--like children. But that's not at all true. Have an honest discussion about what you want, and don't want. Women can have healthy babies well into their 40's. Some may welcome the idea. After all, if she's dating you, she understands that babies are a potential part of being with a younger man.
But it's not all about the guys--older gals have a few rules, too:
First, how young is too young? Attraction has no rules so you may find yourself legitimately interested in someone as young as 20, ladies, depending on their maturity level (translation: how hot their body is...). Here's my hard-and-fast rule: "You have to be 21 to ride this ride." It may sound like a walk in the amusement-park, but if you're helping your boyfriend with his math homework, you have a problem.
Next, don't bring up age! Yours, or his. If it becomes an issue for you, it will become one for him too. Why psych yourself out of what could be a really rewarding experience? Use the mantra, "little-to-no recovery time," if you need to boost your resolve once in a while. Not working? Then it's time to head to your local retirement home and see who isn't dead. Maybe there's a nice 70-something in the market for a younger woman? Viagra, anyone???
Hey, just like younger men, older gals will have to tough out some social scrutiny. But so what? On both ends, friends are just jealous. Everyone knows you're having the best sex of your life. That will definitely get the attention of the green-eyed monsters in your collective worlds. "Go fuck yourself," works best in such cases, but feel free to come up with something similar in your own words.
The bottom line when it comes to younger men and older women is that you both want the same thing: FUN! So do that. Have fun. See what happens. Younger guys may be used to abusing like-aged women. That's a hard habit to break. A caveat for any interested MILFs. And older girls are comfortable with who they are. So younger dudes who aren't should think twice. Otherwise, ignore the haters. And have at it.
Life is not a test-drive, especially when it comes to #LOVE....